Thunder in Our Hearts
by Redd
Summary: This is the moment when their family is destroyed. There is no coming back from this. S3 finale fic. Companion to Swap Our Places.


A/N: I don't won, please don't sue. Title is taken from Running Up that Hill,as we all know by now, I think.

So with the news that Sanctuary is gone, I decided that the only show left on SyFy that I love is Warehouse, which is a shame because I used to love that network and I know that I'm not the only one. So on another rewatch of the S3 finales (because it was that good) I realized I couldn't place what was on in on with Myka - she was just so together. I cannot say how much I adore this cast and these writers because I'll be damned if this isn't one of the best shows I've ever seen.

* * *

In that moment there are a thousand plans running through Myka's head. She should have known that Steve wasn't a traitor. She should have. She had nearly gone over the edge herself, she should have seen it. For Claudia. For Steve. For Pete.

Pete, who is shattered and broken.

Claudia, who is hanging on by a thread.

Steve, who is dead.

_Dead_.

The word is still ringing in her ears, drowning out Pete's breathing and Claudia's cries. Dead. The world is a buzz around her, all thunder and silence. She should have had a plan. She should have known.

She should have gone with Pete - should have bounded up the stairs behind him. She should have had his back. He doesn't take failure well, and she knows that to him, that's what this is. _He_ let Steve die. But she knew, somehow, when Pete pulled away from her and Claudia, that she _couldn't_ follow him. There was still danger, still a chance they were in the hanger and Myka couldn't take that risk, _not_ with Claudia's life. Loosing Claudia would kill him. Loosing Claudia would kill her. She was too young. Without her, _they_ weren't complete.

She wonders if it was Pete's feelings that led him up the stairs, away from the safety of two of the women who loved him most in the world. Myka knew that Jane loved him - he was her son. But there was a part of Myka, a large part, that knew no one would ever love Pete quite like her and Claudia. A sick part of her is glad of whatever force led_ him_ to Steve, so that she wasn't the one who would have to tell Claudia.

So that it wasn't Claudia who saw.

He won't look her in the face and she knows and she wonders if Pete's feelings are rubbing off on her. His eyes are glued to Claudia, broken and terrified and Myka wonders which of them will be the first to break this bubble of chaos they've suddenly found themselves in. Blood is pound in her ears and her heart is in her throat, a fresh wave of adrenaline making itself known and she wants to haul Claudia to the car, make the girl forget what she already knows has happened.

She hates Sykes in that moment more than she's ever hated anyone. Wants to find him and put the bullet in his brain herself. For doing this to Pete. To Steve. To Claudia. They are her family and she couldn't protect them.

This will destroy them. They're getting sucked into Sykes' world, his bundle of hatred and lies and deceit. Even if they live, if they manage to pull themselves free of this torrential downpour of darkness, Myka knows that this is the last moment where they are _them_ . For the last moment Claudia is just a girl, a sweet quirky girl. The last moment were Pete is their everything, their protector and best friend. This is the moment when their family is destroyed.

There is no coming back from this.

In the end it is Claudia who runs, but Pete still won't look her in the face and she knows what he's thinking. It could have been _her_. It could have been _him_. Loosing Steve hurt, but Claudia will go on, somehow, because she always does.

That selfish part of her screams in relief that it's _not Pete_, that for just one more second her partner is a live and solid and _there_. She knows it's cruel, and horrendously selfish, when Steve is dead and Claudia is broken but it _wasn't Pete_ and that's what she needs to get through this.

That's all she's ever needed.

So she'll push forward because they can't.

Because someone has to.

* * *

Myka is really a lot offun to write for ,but I'm thinking of doing one for Claud too - any thoughts?


End file.
